


An Ode to Stephanie Brown

by LiesandTruths



Series: Three dead birds [1]
Category: DCU
Genre: BAMF Stephanie Brown, Dead Robins Club, Stephanie is better than you, dead Stephanie Brown
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-23
Updated: 2019-09-23
Packaged: 2020-10-26 15:10:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20744243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiesandTruths/pseuds/LiesandTruths
Summary: This isn’t how Stephanie pictured her life going. Its better than nothing, she supposes, even though her heart doesn’t beat and she consorts with criminals more often than civilians.





	An Ode to Stephanie Brown

She is nine and her father is screaming and her mother is shouting and she’s curled up in the closet, on the roof, far away from her little apartment and the people she calls parents.

Her father brought pain and suffering and left tears everywhere he went. 

Blood floods her room and out the window while her mother walks through life in a haze of broken sentences. Her father drags her to bars and seats her in the corner while he talks shop. Criminals were her playmates long before she could even speak, and it hurt her, twisted something inside her until it was normal.

No one ever seemed to understand that she lived and breathed the same air as those they fought against.

Little pills scattered the bathroom tiles and rats squealed in the walls. Footsteps made by thudding shoes and harsher bodies tumbled through her door until she was sick on uninvited glee.

***

Riddler quizzed her on English.  
Catwoman taught her how to pick locks and Spanish grammar.  
Harley helped her with chemistry.  
The Joker gave her Candies she never ate. 

***

Shadows and crooked morals were what she was taught, her father's protege long before he was ever important. Tripping over his shoes and being locked in a closet. Darker things lurked in her mind than terrible fathers and indifferent mothers. 

She played with the devil and stole trinkets she never would need from anywhere she could. Her father’s friends taught her how to shoot a gun and snap a neck when she was ten. 

Her mother showed how to dodge rapists and taught her self defence even though she didn’t need it.  
Showed her how to roofie someone in the rare fits of clarity, slipping her pre-made powders and poisons Stephanie would learn to use at her own whim but never wanted to. 

Her tutors were villains and killers of the worst kind. She was never one to back down and when worse came to worst she pulled back her hair and set out. She cared for her mama and hated her papa.

Ivy, Pamela, kissed her forehead and gave her deadly nightshade to wear.  
The girls on the corner showed her how to act like she loved him and when to leave if she didn’t. 

Robin showed her how to fire a grapple gun and how to leap from roof-top to roof-top.  
Batman showed her how to wear bright colors and feel like the world was at her feet. 

And for one single, glorious, burning, smoldering, dazzling, moment, everything was perfect. 

She was her own brand of superhero. 

And then.

Then.

She died.

Her heart stopped and she could feel the pain, she could feel everything, and nothing. 

She lived, she died, she was a ghost, zombie, specter, reverent, vengeful spirit, or protective guardian. 

She is Katavi for a few glorious months.  
She is Spoiler for a few stunning years.  
She is Robin for three aching weeks. 

It takes her a day to realize why she was ever even Robin. Tim, a ploy. That’s all she ever was to Bruce, a pawn in the grand scheme of things. That was his mistake, she was raised by the worst of the worst and still fought against them. 

She tripped over poisons and tucked knives into her skirts. She shoved C-4 into her closet and whatever armor she could find under her bed. Wire in her hair and lock picks in her bra. She tweaked Jokers gas and Scarecrows venoms into something that she could use against them and returned. 

This was the girl who laughed when they told her to go home. When they reduced her to nothing more than a criminal. She grew up laughing when someone was hurt and ended up being the one hurting those she once called family. This is the girl who slipped years of school and still got into university. She is a genius in her own right and does not need to conform to others' opinions. 

***

She came back and refused to back down easy.

She pulled at the shadows and demanded they hide her. Stephanie made them listen, and they did. Dressed in black and pouring the sins of those Batman let go into his lap she waged a war on anyone who ever hurt her. Against Bruce for letting go, Tim for not being there, Leslie for faking her death, Black mask for killing her, Crystal for never loving her, Arthur for pushing her to grow up. 

She pushed and pulled and forced Gotham to see her in all of her twisting biting light. Made Cass come home from Hong Kong and Tim from his boy band. Made Barbara look up and realize where she went wrong. Made Jason understand he wasn’t alone. Made Bruce realize she wasn’t ever gonna go down easy. 

***

Stephanie Brown faked her death and faked her life. Forgery after forgery was what made up her life. She hacked and twisted and curled around the truths that were her life and made them lies. She snuck into galas dressed to the nines and saw the Wayne’s faces as they realized she was back. She tugged on fishnets and miniskirts and strolled down the streets with dozens of girls. An ear to the ground and a hand in the gutter.

She got an apartment in the worst part of town and scared everyone else off. She made herself a reputation of Cluemasters daughter, she poured everything she was taught into herself and put anything else into the night. She visited bars frequented by criminals and caught Matches Bruce’s eye from across the room. That was how he found out she was back. Twirling a glass and talking cheerfully to Riddler. 

Batman showed up at her door the next day with harsh truths on his tongue and left with an red rimmed eyes. Tim visited and called her beautiful and conniving, all she could do was laugh, laugh in his face. Cass came by and cried with her. 

***

There was more Gotham in her than anyone else and yet they wanted her to cut it out of her. Peel away her skin and tear out the parts that kept her alive. 

Stephanie Brown bled black and her heart didn’t beat. She was a dead girl walking. She had one foot in the light and the rest hidden in the dark and no one could take that away. Dyed blonde hair reflected the light like oil on water and her dark skin absorbed light until she glittered like a diamond. Her teeth were too sharp for her and her smiles too wide. She didn’t blink or breathe and she felt nothing and everything at the same time. 

***

Timmy tried to love her once. He tried so hard and still it didn’t take.  
She was the daughter of a demon and swam in the sins of her people day and night. He slept in a huge house with too much food and not enough love. There was no room for love in their relationship, only dependency. You cannot love someone if you don’t know their name, or their life, or who they are. You can’t love someone if you don’t know who you’re in love with. 

Cass was her rock.  
She was stubborn and sweet and darling. She was there when Stephanie needed her most and then was gone. 

Jason was her in a different life, brow beaten and stifled.  
Hidden away and trying to make ends meet. He was starving and trying. He grew up with needles on the floor and a dying mother. She grew up with tiny knives and cuts littering her hands. 

Dick avoided her,  
there was no reason to speak to someone who he didn’t know. 

Barbara hated her.  
She was spiteful and cruel and mourning. Barbara was mourning Jason and her legs and the scraps of a life she loved. She was in pain and took everything out on those around her. Stephanie was an easy target and slipped in and out before disappearing. 

Damian was new, he was a child of abuse and training. He was skilled and sharp and angry.  
She loved him and he loved her. Siblings in all but blood, the daughter of the demons head was angry and terrified. You do not threaten someone with nothing and everything left to lose. You do not touch someone who grew up on the heels of mass murderers, someone who had died and come back as easily as breathing. There are lines that Talia had crossed before and this one was not one she would. 

***

It wasn’t until after Stephanie left anyone ever even noticed her. The slipped knives and whip fast thinking, the connections only an alley rat could have. Dozens of stashes filled with explosives and money and weapons. Left untouched for years until she returned. 

She had hoped they would understand and she had hoped they would listen and she had hoped they would forgive. But they didn’t. The drowned her and killed and left her and never forgot. She was the daughter of a criminal, the overlooked queen, and she was dead. 

***

There’s a million things I could say, she was kind, she was understanding, she was generous, she was gentle. None of those would be true. She was cold and cruel and stiff and harsh, she played too roughly and made sure she got her way even when it seemed impossible.  
But she did it with a smile on her face and a calloused hand outstretched to anybody who needed it. 

She was Spoiler. 

She was Robin. 

She was Katavi. 

She was Batgirl. 

She was glorious. 

She was dead. 

She was alive. 

She was a mish-mash of stolen things and fallen stars.  
Of babies laughter and sobbing planets.  
Millions of things that formed one stunningly, gloriously, beautifully, broken girl.  
One girl who said no and rewrote her own destiny in a single instance.

**Author's Note:**

> Stephanie did die, she didn’t just fake her death. I really wanted to emphasize how empowering she is to me at least.
> 
> I did totally fuck with canon in this so please regard this as an au.


End file.
